Tuesday, September 19, 2006

step away from the pre-packaged salad and no one gets hurt

Apparently, today is sorority Bid Day at the Education Corporation that I work for.

I say "apparently" because all of the clustering, squealing and hugging made it kind of difficult to understand exactly what was going on. Still, when the teeny brunette girl with the Long Island accent spilled chicken soup all over my arm in Au Bon Pain, she was shrieking about SDTs. It sounded like happy shrieking, so I'm going to assume that she's a new sorority pledge and not afflicted with both dyslexia and syphilis.

I will however, have to ask all undergraduates to restrict their celebrating to the entrances of restaurants that I don't frequent for lunch. Acceptable places they may block the entrances of are: Chick Fil-A, the sketchy pizza place by the World Bank, any Quizno's in the metro-DC area and Jamba Juice. I'm an old fart now, so I would like to get in, get my lunch and quickly get back to the office without being trapped behind endless blocks of clustered gossiping youth.

And yo, Long Island, it's swell that you're so happy, but if you burn my arm with your food again we are totally going to rumble. Since you're you're a lowly pledge, your sisters are totally going to see my expression and ditch you to go buy big sunglasses while you face my wrath alone.

Luv ya! Bye!

7 comments:

E :) said...

I loved the one who dropped a glass bottle full of orange juice on my toe. Definitely sorority pledge day. Things are way more insane than usual. I'm just going to crawl back to my office with no windows and hide.

Scot in DC said...

I saw them after they got their bids - they are now all wearing matching tee's. The campus is way more active today - very annoying

I-66 said...

Hmm... a rare case of syphilexia.

I hear it's deadly.

bettyjoan said...

Haha...I was an SDT pledge once...now that I'm an alum, if you need any sorority ass-whoopins carried out for the sake of a squeel-free lunch break, let me know. :-)

Asian Mistress said...

Hahahah that is funny

Law-Rah said...

My gawd, they were everywhere!

sparkles anonymous! said...

(Shudder)