Friday, December 01, 2006

we're having a heat wave, a tropical heat wave

Current Temperature in DC: 75 degrees


Current Temperature in Galveston, TX: 47 degrees
Current Temperature in San Jose, CA: 57 degrees
Current Temperature in Temple, AZ: 60 degrees

Whither the winter wonderland, people? Would someone please explain to me how I am supposed to deck my halls when DC is currently hotter than the entire southwest?

Memo to the Baby Jesus: when Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye sang "Heat Wave" in White Christmas, it was part of a kicky cabaret act and not in any way a prayer for actual weather they wanted to experience. Because if it stays this hot, then there is no way that the General's ski lodge will have enough snow to get visitors and it will be way too toasty for Bing and Rosemary Clooney to count their blessings in front of the fire and poor Vera Ellen will be entirely too sweaty to wear all those turtlenecked leotards and tap dance her skinny little heart out and THEN what will we do with the General when he stops being a General because the General is not smart enough to get with global warming and the fact that in ten years Vermont will have the climate of Belize!

Ahem.

Sorry. The heat is making my brain melt. The point is: shorts and air-conditioning in December = unnatural and wrong.

5 comments:

I-66 said...

EJ... you know I think you are a wonderful and fantabulous person, but reminding me of the relatively cooler temperatures elsewhere that have no business being cooler than here when you must know that I am already in an uproar about it makes me want to stuff your Christmas stocking with coal.

Not that I would.

I'm just saying.

Still wonderful and fantabulous.

ejtakeslife said...

You see? This is what heat DOES to people! It makes friends snap at each other on the Internet! Stop the insanity!

I-66 said...

[taking deep breaths]

Lindsay said...

Shorts, flip flops, and AC in December is what I grew up with. I'm glad to see the climate in DC is becoming similar to that of Palm Springs. If only we had more palm trees. Bring on global warming, I say!

I still insist on carrying my wool coat with me, though....I just don't trust this weather and feel like the temp could plummet to 30 degrees at any time.

Lillian said...

Dude, it didn't get above 11 degrees in Denver on Tuesday. I didn't leave my apartment ALL EFFING DAY. (Why it rocks when your grad school runs on the quarter system, leaving you with a 6-week interterm break during which time you can choose to not leave your apartment all day: Part One.)

But seriously, I hope you get some holiday cheer and cold weather soon! :)